Meet Agnes. Again.
I started my Medium page on December 17, 2021. After 8 months of writing on my blog, and many moments of questioning, I began.
Everyone seemed to tell me, 'You already have a blog, focus on that for now. You can build on another platform later.' But thankfully, I didn’t want to be a big Medium writer.
I had no big dreams concerning the page. I started an account knowing that I wanted to write about books and relatable essays. I just wanted to help, motivate and inspire other young people to embrace their peculiarities.
It was 2022 when I was 'noticed’. One essay reached 1,000 views. My readers doubled. Hundred in days.
This ever-growing community has somehow formed, and I am constantly inspired by the talent in my viewership and Medium community.
At the end of the day, I’m just Agnes.
Being asked "What next?" after losing my Medium account leaves me clueless. I wish I knew.
I think as long as I’m having a positive effect on my corner of the internet, writing and sharing vulnerable pieces, I’ll be happy.
So, let’s meet Agnes again, shall we?
When my boss said “Tell us about yourself” at a Google Meet meeting, I knew I would give another failed response because I’ve always failed to understand the question. The question might seem simple and direct, but it’s quite complicated. I have many versions of me that I didn’t know the part of me they wanted to know about, so it wasn’t surprising that my head went blank after saying my name.
Whenever I get asked this question, I always want to ask, “What do you want to know?”
Do you want to know about what I do and my accomplishments, or my beliefs and principles,
The songs I listen to or the books I read,
My virtues or my vices,
My moments of weakness or strength,
Because if you ask that question without any specification, I’d have nothing to say apart from my name.
12:45 pm. Lord Huron’s “The Night We Met.”
I am quite passionate about people. Although I might not be the friendliest, most conversational, or outspoken girl among others, I’m genuinely interested in people. I love my friends and family deeply. I love the silent comforts and deep conversations. Friendship is a sheltering tree for me, and I’m grateful for the few ones that ground me.
1:00 pm. Sia’s “California Dreamin’”
I live in my head too much. I’m the girl who uses thought to not participate in life. I like being alone - alone feels safe. I like to hear my thoughts echo around in my brain until I forget them, and then sometimes, I like to keep my mouth closed and watch the world around me instead of immersing myself in other people’s conversations, trying to listen to be polite, but my mind drifting far from them, unable to bring me back home. I so much romanticize a quiet life.
I’m a little bit boring and not very easy to interact with. I like staying at home to read novels, watch movies, peruse articles, and write. I’m not wild. I’m not reserved, but I’m not outrageous. I like boring because it’s comforting.
I hate labels, but I guess you’ve figured it out – I’m an introvert. This might be my favorite version of me.
1:15 pm. Aurora’s “A Temporary High.”
Music is a universal gift. We all love good music and I do as well (emphasis on good music).
There’s this quote from Stephen Chobsky’s “Perks of Being a Wallflower” that I find gripping:
“I had an amazing feeling when I finally held the tape in my hand. I just thought to myself that in the palm of my hand, there was this one tape that had all of these memories and feelings and great joy and sadness. Right there in the palm of my hand. And I thought about how many people have loved those songs. And how many people got through a lot of bad times because of those songs. And how many people enjoyed good times with those songs. And how much those songs really mean. I think it would be great to have written one of those songs. I bet if I wrote one of them, I would be very proud. I hope the people who wrote those songs are happy. I hope that they feel it’s enough. I really do because they’ve made me happy. And I’m only one person.”
1:30 pm. Ruelle’s “Carry You.”
Everyone’s form of happiness stems from someone or something or somewhere. Some people base their happiness in the fiction world, on characters they relate to. Mine stems from time spent with my lover - the one who didn’t need me to be perfect, the one who just wants my heart. He is enough, and will always be enough to satisfy all my hunger and questions.
I am a believer. I am a child of GOD, and I’m forever sold to Christ. That’s one identity I’m fully certain of.
1:45 pm. The Goo Goo Dolls' “Iris.”
I’m a true book nerd. I read first because I love reading. I do not read to pass an exam or for research, or because of external pressure, I read because I cannot stop. Reading for me is innate. I read about books and their authors. I talk about books with my friends. I annotate books and take notes like I’m doing a deep assignment. I analyze books for their strengths and flaws. I post about books. I laugh and cry over books. I have fictional characters as best friends.
I’ve always loved reading. Everything from a magical in-depth wizardry novel to a terrifying horror book to romance novels and informational pamphlets. Reading brings me joy. It heightens my knowledge and expands my world. As a reader, I get to live two lives, and it’s the sweetest.
2:00 pm. Hooked Like Helen “Liar.”
First, I am a writer. I love sharing things - ideas, the happenings of my life, tips and advice, and motivation. The development of my blog has taught me that there is nothing more valuable than connecting with people, especially in being a source of help.
I am not a scribbler or a dabbler but a proper writer. I write articles, blog posts and create content for websites. I’m a freelance writer who is not opposed to the idea of a gig or two.
I am a Faith and Self-improvement blogger who manages a blog dedicated to faith, with a focus on productivity, motivation, and self-help.
I blog, not as some guru who has spent a millennium studying and teaching these philosophies, but as someone who is still going through the mud with you.
The truth is these topics – faith, finding your purpose in life, overcoming imposter syndrome, building a powerful self-image, self-improvement, and goal achievement – are what I’m also figuring out along the way, but if there’s something I’ve already experienced on my journey that could serve you, then that is more important to me than having all the answers.
My blog might not ever be read by millions, but I’ve got something to share and a platform to do it.
If you're here and you're reading this, I guess I have to thank you, for it means you hold some kind of belief in my writings.
Medium has offered me the world and more at my fingertips, and I am so grateful for a platform to share my written words.
I hope you visit this corner of the internet for bookish content, inspiration, and a reminder that you are never alone.
So, I welcome you. A new start. A new route of connection.
I cannot wait to grow alongside you, my friend.
I appreciate you. Thank you for being here!
